Yesterday was a hard day, mentally. Matthew was working all morning and I was home with the girls.
I’m not sure if it is that I’m adjusting to our new life where Matthew isn’t home as much as he was when he was ill. He was normally in bed all day and I could easily pop in the room whenever I wanted and talk to him.
Now, I’m on my own, in my own mind for hours. Not having active conversation except with my girls which can be rather tedious, at times. Especially with Grace, my three year old daughter, who, I think, is at a developmental age where she is trying to understand speech. What this looks like, is her asking a lot of questions about everything around her including every action I take. She wants to understand ALL that is going on. Which I am grateful for. She is very intelligent and learning rapidly but like I said, it is very tedious and requires a high measure of patience. I have to be grateful to the Lord that He has given me of His Spirit so I can constantly draw from this virtue. Shamefully, I haven’t been taken advantage of that which I hope will change.
Tomorrow will be another day where Matthew will be working all day. I want to prepare my mind for this. So, hopefully, I will wake up in the morning at around 5 AM and read my Bible.
Reading my Bible was so helpful to me this evening. I had truly been battling in my mind against many thoughts and my own desires. Something that really helped me was reading Romans 6, particularly the part where it says using our members as instruments unto righteousness:
“Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts, and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God.”
Romans 6:12-13 NASB
After reading this, I kept repeating in my mind and out loud that I wanted to use my members as instruments of righteousness to God. Grace was asking me, as always, when she sees me doing something unusual, “Que haces mamá?” (Mom, what are you doing?”). I explained to her that I was thinking about a teaching from God on using our body parts to do good for God. She didn’t really understand and was telling me she didn’t want to do that. 😆
But anyway, yes I want to use my body part as instruments of righteousness to God. So I thought about the different body parts like my hands, my arms, my feet, my legs, my mouth, my eyes, my ears etc. & how could use each of these things to work good for God and others, whereas normally I’d use these things to fulfill my own selfish desires.
I pray that as I stay home with my girls tomorrow, I will be stronger mentally. I believe I can accomplish this by renewing my mind as it says in Romans 12:
“Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Romans 12:1-2 NASB
Matthew had actually reminded me that I am usually much better emotionally and mentally when I am reading my bible and meditating on what I’m reading there, as opposed to navigating the internet which is what I was doing yesterday. I was trying to figure out what was going on with me. At the moment, I didn’t believe him but as I’m writing this, it makes so much sense. I’ll just read and girt up the loins of my mind so I can take on my day.
In Jesus Name. Amen!
“Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”
1 Peter 1:13 NASB
Kept by Christ 